Finding the strength to feel vulnerable

Every emotion we experience has a polarity and we are all affected by a continuum of different moods. Yet our society expects us to focus on the positive side of everything, and asks that we be continually on top of our game. Realistically, this is not possible, nor is it helpful for our self-care. Everyone has times of low energy and unpleasant mind states and when we deny ourselves from feeling into our experience, we are potentially missing an opportunity for connection.

The next time you find yourself portraying a persona of invincibility – maybe step back and notice whats happening underneath. Are you as confident as you portray – or are you shielding vulnerable feelings? Remember – its okay to not feel okay.

When you have the courage to lean in and allow yourself to feel vulnerable, you are making a conscious choice to connect with whats truly happening for you. Even though it may feel unpleasant – if you let yourself feel it – maybe you can start to heal it.

July’s Sage self-care project

How do you deal with obstacles you face?

Try recognising ways that you meet obstacles that come up in your daily life.

Do you notice a pattern of instinctively wanting to shut things out and pretend that everything is good?

  • Are you able to soften – when your impulse is to be hard
  • Can you reflect on your own reaction to a situation – rather than focusing on your opinion about it?
  • Could you be generous when you instinctively feel like hoarding?
  • Do you notice your self-talk when faced with an obstacle?
  • Are you able to hear your inner critic for what it is? 

Perhaps you could try:

  • focusing on your breath
  • writing or drawing things down
  • talking to someone 
  • walking in nature

When you experience overwhelming emotions – allow yourself to respond to them. Give yourself permission to cry if you need or tell someone if you are feeling angry. Notice what happens when you acknowledge and identify how you are feeling.

Trust in your strength to feel vulnerable.

If you would like more information on how to incorporate some tools or practices that you could use in your day to day life, please contact me  charlotte@sagepractices.co.nz

 

 

 

Sneak in a siesta

Sleep is one of our greatest elixirs. We all feel so much better after a decent nights sleep. The quality of our sleep greatly impacts our health, so it’s worthwhile putting in the effort to optimise the benefits. Developing good sleep hygiene is one of the greatest self-care practices we can apply.

Sleep is a complete science and a topic that is well worth investigating – especially if it is something that you struggle with. Research claims that sleep can be both preventative and restorative for a wide range of mental and physical ailments, yet studies show that up to 40% of the population have problems with sleep.

How much attention do you give to creating healthy and sound sleep?

Developing restorative sleep is an adaptive practice throughout our lives. There are many contributing factors to both healthy and disruptive sleep.

Here are some practical suggestions on how you can initiate restorative sleep patterns. Pick out what is relevant for you.

  1. Firstly, work out for yourself how much sleep you actually need. The most common recommendations are between 7 – 9 hours, however this differs for everyone. Spend a bit of time exploring how much your body needs.
  2. Tune into your natural body cycle – are you a lark or and owl? An early or late riser? Plan your schedule to support your circadian clock so that you optimise your energy levels during the day. 
  3. Learn to siesta – power napping is king! Even just a quick 10-minute snooze when your energy levels are low can regulate your body clock and improve your nighttime sleep. The action of lying down to rest is healing in itself. 

The following actions can help you foster healthier sleep.

  • Aim to go to bed around the same time each night
  • Create a relaxation routine before bed
      • Reduce screen time an hour before bed
      • Make your bedroom as dark and cool as possible 
      • Turn all appliances off at the wall (including standby lights) 
      • Practice conscious breathing and relaxation techniques to help your mind unwind
  • When you wake – open the curtains and gaze at the natural morning light for a few minutes. This action helps activate your body clock and supports the body’s physiological functions including your digestion and the production of melatonin
  • Avoid wearing sunglasses in the morning so you absorb vitamin D from the sunlight
  • Exercise earlier in the day (rather than later)
  • Hydrate more than you already do  – drink plenty of water
  • Eat a smaller meal at the end of the day (try and make lunch your largest meal).

Try making this month’s self care project about fostering good sleep patterns to help strengthen your immune system over the winter.

If you would like to investigate this in more detail contact me at charlotte@sagepractices.co.nz

I can teach you some breathing and relaxation techniques to help calm your mind to switch off and get a better sleep.